55 Rules For Love – Rule #45 – Do Not Be Afraid, Love Requires Surrender

To Give Yourself Over According to Merriam-Webster, to surrender is “to give (oneself) over to something (such as an influence)” There are times when I feel butterflies in my belly, an excitedness of feeling so in love with my husband, Michael. But, I don’t give myself over to it – I resist it – because…

55 Rules For Love – Rule #44 – Walk Together, Cook Together, Bathe Together, Read Together

Hanging Out Together We like each other’s company and feel very comfortable together. We’re best friends! I think Rule #44 speaks for itself in the importance of creating quality time together during everyday activities like cooking, bathing, walking or reading together. As well, we’re not staring at technology screens – we’re actually engaged with each…

55 Rules For Love – Rule #42 – Take Picnics And Sleep Under The Stars

Creating Nice Moments Packing for a picnic and sleeping under the stars is not a usual way people spend their time as it requires a bit of work and planning. As well, a hundred things can go wrong such as: bugs crawling over or landing on the food, bugs that bite like mosquitos, forgetting something…

55 Rules For Love – Rule #41 – Do At Least One Romantic And Thoughtful Thing Every Day

This Morning… As I lay in bed processing this Rule #41, I asked my husband Michael his thoughts on it. Our conversation evolved into determining the difference between complimenting each other, and what a romantic gesture is compared to being thoughtful. Complimenting each other is its own rule, Rule #38 – Compliment Often. Romance and…

55 Rules For Love – Rule #40 – Be Attentive And Understand What’s Not Said

Difficult Conversations I would imagine, even for the most experienced communicator, that there are conversations where some words are hard to say. There is a deep yearning within, a hope the recipient of the difficult conversation has some understanding of what the conversation is about – and is able to have the profound level of…

55 Rules For Love – Rule #39 – Discover Each Other

To Discover To discover, basically means to find something unexpected about my husband Michael that I didn’t see before. I Do This Best When I’m in the present moment, not trying to change anything about it. I’m not wearing lenses of preference, judgement, bias, or opinion. This discovery could be during a stressful time, a…

55 Rules For Love – Rule #37 – Don’t Waste Energy With Negative Thoughts

Cognitive Distortions I’ve had enough personal experience in therapy to be well aware of the types of cognitive distortions there are, usually addressed with Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, CBT. This blog isn’t about how this therapy works. I’m referring to CBT to identify the types of cognitive distortions or, simply put – negative thinking – that…

55 Rules For Love – Rule #36 – Do Not Carelessly Throw Away Love

Kate and Toby Recently, my husband Michael and I started watching the powerful family drama, This Is Us, on Netflix. We immediately fell in love with the show. We’re nearing the end of the first season, and as I prepared to dive into writing Rule #36 – Do Not Carelessly Throw Love Away, I thought…