According to Merriam-Webster, to surrender is “to give (oneself) over to something (such as an influence)”
There are times when I feel butterflies in my belly, an excitedness of feeling so in love with my husband, Michael. But, I don’t give myself over to it – I resist it – because it feels so vulnerable. I feel anxious, excited. This happening of love that is so possible, and is actually happening now.
There is this fear of some sort of loss of control – that I will lose myself. That love is constricting – smothering – it shrinks rather than expands; there isn’t enough of it to go around and I will lose out on getting my share of it. As well, if I give myself over to it – I will no longer be in control – someone else will control me. Or, someone will hurt me, betray me. Break my heart, again.
However, there is this great release when I surrender into love – because love actually starts with myself. When I settle into self-love – feeling truly at home in my own skin – feeling secure in my own skin – I then expand my love outwards.
Allowing love to happen is to allow yourself to be vulnerable.
To let the warmth of love wash over you like a waterfall, and soak into every cell of your being.
I also believe that surrendering into love deepens over time – as we allow ourselves to become more and more vulnerable because we feel safe.
I feel safe.
I lower the drawbridge and surrender…
Originally published: April 4th, 2021
About me: Stephanie Wells
I’m a Reiki Master Teacher of Usui Shiki Ryoho – the Usui System of Natural Healing. I was attuned in Levels I, II & IIIA in Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada. During a 6 week stay in Mararikulam North, Kerala, India I was reattuned in Levels I, II, & IIIA as well as acquiring my Level IIIB Master Teacher attunement.