Hurt people hurt.
My husband Michael told me these profound, yet simple words a few years ago.
He said this to me because when I was angry at him, I would lash out saying words to hurt him that I would quickly regret.
My transition from aggression and going for the throat when arguing, to learning emotional regulation and how to be assertive in a calm, rational way has been and still is a work in progress.
What is helping me along this transformation is an acceptance of what is, letting go of past hurts and resentments. and learning to take a look at myself – remember – love is a mirror.
As well, realizing how absolutely destructive drama and aggression are to a relationship.
I am striving for a peaceful life.
Michael and I are striving for a peaceful life together.
There will be moments between us, between husband and wife, when we disappoint each other or unintentionally hurt each other.
But to sort out these moments, why would I say words to purposely hurt the heart of the man I love?
His heart is his gift to me, a precious gift I nurture with safety, respect and love.
Words are claimed to be more powerful than the sword.
I choose words of love and encouragement.
Not words that hurt.
S, ❤️
Originally published: January 15th, 2020
About me: Stephanie Wells
I’m a Reiki Master Teacher of Usui Shiki Ryoho – the Usui System of Natural Healing. I was attuned in Levels I, II & IIIA in Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada. During a 6 week stay in Mararikulam North, Kerala, India I was reattuned in Levels I, II, & IIIA as well as acquiring my Level IIIB Master Teacher attunement.
55 Rules For Love:
Study Of “The 55 Rules For Love”
55 Rules For Love – Rule #1 – When It Arrives, Cherish It
55 Rules For Love – Rule #2 – Whatever You Accept, You Will Get
55 Rules For Love – Rule # 5 – Don’t Say Words With The Intent To Hurt
55 Rules For Love – Rule # 6 – Accept And Forgive Easily
55 Rules For Love – Rule #7 – Don’t Be Scared To Disagree, It Is Healthy
55 Rules For Love – Rule #8 – Never Be Too Busy For Each Other
55 Rules For Love – Rule #9 – Do Not Punish
55 Rules For Love – Rule #10 – Accept Honest Criticism, It Is Good For Us
55 Rules For Love – Rule #11 – Admit When You Are Wrong, Quickly
55 Rules For Love – Rule #12 – Support Each Other When The Going Gets Tough
55 Rules For Love – Rule # 13 – Live In The Moment – Be Present
55 Rules For Love – Rule #14 – Leave The Past Where It Belongs
55 Rules For Love – Rule #15 – Leave Drama Out Of It
55 Rules For Love – Rule #16 – Don’t Try To Control
55 Rules For Love – Rule #17 – Allow A Small Amount of Jealousy
55 Rules For Love – Rule #18 – Don’t Use Comparisons
55 Rules For Love – Rule #19 – Celebrate Differences
55 Rules For Love – Rule #20 – Communicate Openly and Honestly
55 Rules For Love – Rule #21 – Listen Very Carefully
55 Rules For Love – Rule #22 – Don’t Judge
55 Rules For Love – Rule # 23 – Don’t Manipulate To Get Results
55 Rules For Love – Rule # 24 – Learn and Grow
55 Rules For Love – Rule #25 – Don’t Try To Change Each Other
55 Rules For Love – Rule #26 – Don’t Condemn Each Other’s Family and Friends
55 Rules For Love – Rule #27 – Lines, Flaws and Imperfections are Beautiful
55 Rules For Love – Rule #28 – Trust Your Instincts, But Don’t Be Paranoid
55 Rules For Love – Rule #30 – Instead of Power, Aim For Balance
55 Rules for Love – Rule #31 – Space Is Needed To Breathe And To Grow
55 Rules for Love – Rule #32 – Accept That You Are Both Unique – Never Compare
55 Rules For Love – Rule #33 – Have Fun, Laugh and Play – A Lot
55 Rules For Love – Rule #34 – Be Each Other’s Best Friend
55 Rules For Love – Rule #35 – Don’t Play Mind Games
55 Rules For Love – Rule #36 – Do Not Carelessly Throw Away Love
55 Rules For Love – Rule #37 – Don’t Waste Energy With Negative Thoughts
55 Rules For Love – Rule #38 – Compliment Often
55 Rules For Love – Rule #39 – Discover Each Other
55 Rules For Love – Rule #40 – Be Attentive And Understand What’s Not Said
55 Rules For Love – Rule #41 – Do At Least One Romantic And Thoughtful Thing Every Day
55 Rules For Love – Rule #42 – Take Picnics And Sleep Under The Stars
55 Rules For Love – Rule #43 – Don’t Just Speak About It, Show Love
55 Rules For Love – Rule #44 – Walk Together, Cook Together, Bathe Together, Read Together
55 Rules For Love – Rule #45 – Do Not Be Afraid, Love Requires Surrender
55 Rules For Love – Rule #46 – Be Loyal And Faithful
55 Rules For Love – Rule #47 – Trust
55 Rules For Love – Rule # 48 – Be Grateful
55 Rules For Love – Rule #49 – Fluidity Is Good, Accept Change
55 Rules For Love – Rule #50 – Don’t Sleep On A Fight
55 Rules For Love – Rule #51 – Don’t Cling To It, Know When To Let Go
55 Rules For Love – Rule #52 – Discover What Turns You Both On And Explore It
55 Rules For Love – Rule #52 – Make Love, But Also F*ck (Regularly)
55 Rules For Love – Rule #54 – Give And Receive Without Measure
55 Rules For Love – Rule #55 – Never Gamble With What You Can’t Afford To Lose