Fear robs me of perspective and insight.
When I am in fear I enter a state of fight, flight or freeze.
- Fight = angry, resentful, I’m right – you’re wrong, grudge-filled thoughts
- Flight = anxiety – can’t breathe – have to get away
- Freeze = numb, shut-down, dissociated, dulled senses, tired, lethargic, can’t think
The ability to emotionally regulate these fear responses, to gain perspective and insight, takes quite a bit of work because I have to genuinely believe that I have the ability to handle whatever has triggered the fear, either real or imagined. Even more consciously evolved is being able to tell the difference between an imagined fear and real fear.
Most fears are imagined, born in an uncertain world.
The world is an uncertain place. To feel safe in an uncertain world is having faith and trust in myself that everything is going to be okay because I can remain calm and handle whatever happens, with perspective.
To do this, to self-regulate my thoughts and genuinely believe in myself to overcome fear is a self-taught skill, not a given. It takes actual awareness and practice.
Mix in compassion and patience.
And a belief that most people want what is best for others; positive intent.
My job requires the ability to support emotional regulation in another. Yet, my ability to emotionally regulate me is a daunting task. It is the reframing, gaining perspective that is the most difficult because I do not trust my own perception of something.
What is real, what is not?
Insight is my answer. To hear my inner truth, that guides the way. There is no denying that truth. That reality. Insight is what I know. This is what I know.
And a baby-step mantra I tell myself – be calm, this is what I know and everything is going to be okay.
About me: Stephanie Wells
I’m a Reiki Master Teacher of Usui Shiki Ryoho – the Usui System of Natural Healing. I was attuned in Levels I, II & IIIA in Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada. During a 6 week stay in Mararikulam North, Kerala, India I was reattuned in Levels I, II, & IIIA as well as acquiring my Level IIIB Master Teacher attunement.